Hey Stevie. I like it. I don't know your game enough to know if the design suits it, but like the typewriter font. Is the colour right? It's a bit dull to me, but does it have significance?
I like the pitch, especially the multiple exclamation marks. My suggestions are mainly around spacing - I'd leave a little more space at the top, before the white starts. There's an extra space (or two) after 'cult!', which may be deliberate, but which annoys me. Also, space needed after your comma after 'novel,'. Also, you have an Oxford/serial comma in the last bit, which is getting more an more old-fashioned, but you might want to keep it just to annoy people.
Thanks, Helen! I'll make those spacing changes you suggest.
The colour will stay for the moment. I'll looking for something that says 'downbeat 70s', and that military olive is the best default option that Microsoft Paint will give me.
I think it looks very 70s trashy novel back (though the ones my folks have are mostly that orange colour, also some hot pink, some turquoise, some grey).
I like the Doppelgangers and Yoga... Men in Black feels a bit too 90s... and conventional RPGish, which is not what made Left Coast stand out for me... But I guess it all depends what the players like and are into, and Men in Black can be fun too :)
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5 comments:
Hey Stevie. I like it. I don't know your game enough to know if the design suits it, but like the typewriter font. Is the colour right? It's a bit dull to me, but does it have significance?
I like the pitch, especially the multiple exclamation marks. My suggestions are mainly around spacing - I'd leave a little more space at the top, before the white starts. There's an extra space (or two) after 'cult!', which may be deliberate, but which annoys me. Also, space needed after your comma after 'novel,'. Also, you have an Oxford/serial comma in the last bit, which is getting more an more old-fashioned, but you might want to keep it just to annoy people.
That was all so pernickity! Good work!!!
Thanks, Helen! I'll make those spacing changes you suggest.
The colour will stay for the moment. I'll looking for something that says 'downbeat 70s', and that military olive is the best default option that Microsoft Paint will give me.
Are you seriously doing that in Microsoft Paint??!! ??!!
I suspect you will be able to find something free that is better.
I think it looks very 70s trashy novel back (though the ones my folks have are mostly that orange colour, also some hot pink, some turquoise, some grey).
I like the Doppelgangers and Yoga... Men in Black feels a bit too 90s... and conventional RPGish, which is not what made Left Coast stand out for me... But I guess it all depends what the players like and are into, and Men in Black can be fun too :)
And I'm ALL about making poor life decisions! I'd play this game just for that!
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