My half of Act 1 is done and sent off to Andrew. Overall I'm happy. It's got a far more casual tone that the 'dark intense thriller' I was imagining ... but there's a long way to go yet and a lot more pressure to be put on characters.
That tricky scene from a couple of days ago: first I improved it 150% by starting it halfway through and removing a lot of "I'm sad," "I'm angry," dialogue. Then today I whipped up a version of it that was about half a page long and almost entirely non-verbal which I like and which I went with.
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