Queen Bees & Wannabes

By Rosalind Wiseman

It’s an analysis of the social group formed by teenage girls in American high schools. The movie, Mean Girls, was based on it. (Here's my review of it.)

THE POINT (seems to be) At high school, you don’t realise you’re fighting a long game. Short term, the choices you make may increase your popularity – but long-term they cost you control over your self-esteem.

Part 1: The middle of the book.

(Much of this is verbatim ...)

What don’t girls like so much about their friendships with other girls? The answers tend to be about competition: over looks, style, friends, popularity and boys. (This is great – because most of the comedy I write comes from competitiveness … so knowing this just made my job easier.)

Teasing in a clique is done to put the recipient in her place (below her in the totem pole). It’s usually effective because the people closest to you know how to push your buttons best.

And a note for busybody parents: Adults seem to forget: if you get the bully into trouble, at some puoint she’ll find you and no one will be around to help. You must teach your daughter to fight her own battles. Your involvement should be limited to strategising with her about what she wants to do and then affirming that she has the strength to carry it out.